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Trolley Car Diner

10/12/04 | by david2 [mail] | Categories: General
I'm doing this a favor to anybody who might be thinking of stopping and eating at the Trolley Car Diner. It is, without a doubt the worst place to eat in Philadelphia.

It didn't come by that title easily. I've eaten there at least 6 times, and not once can I say that the food was even close to satisfactory. Why do I keep going back? I guess it's just a dire wish on my part that one of the few places at all to eat in Mt Airy would at least be somewhere near satisfactory. Sadly, this isn' the case.

And it's not just me. Whenever casual conversation brings up this place, the first thing out of peoples mouths when I mention my disappointment with the place is, " Oh, I knowwwwww ... it's so baaaad" !

After all, how can you fuck up diner food? It's supposed to be 'bad' to begin with, but bad in a good way. It's supposed to be tasty, filling, and cheap. Presentation isn't part of the deal, nor is health. Quantity counts more than quality. But even still, there are limits and standards. Screwing up diner food is like screwing up fixing dinner for your cat: it's pretty damned hard to do.

As hard as it is, however, here are a few hints I picked up from my visits to the Trolly Car: Don't serve regular any regular juice, but instead serve pre-sweetened concentrate stuff from a machine. Screw up the hash browns on a regular basis, serve some kind of mystery meat for the sausage. Overcook the eggs. Make sure the toast is over toasted and stale. And that's just breakfast.

It just goes on and on. I just don't know how someone could screw it up so badly, but they have managed to. I suppose they get some sort of award for that.


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